Your eyes alone would elicit such a reaction
that the ships launched for Helen would pale
in comparison to the force that rose to defend
your honour.
Your smill inspires peace to those
with the privilege of experiencing it.
From that smile emanates a kindnes that reaches
across creation through the lives of those
you're touched.
Your voice, I will not insult you by comparing it to
the sirens, those hags. Angels, the choruses fall
silent to hear you speak. The Morningstar fell
from heaven to one day bask in the glory of
your songs.
Your touch, I shall not corrupt the purity
of your body with my filth. You are the
temple, the Holy Place, sacred, wherein only
spirit of God dares tread, and in your
presence He is leprous.
Your love, for your love I fear to put pen to
paper. In times past I have seen those who received
your gratitude burst into flame under the
intensity of that rare emotion. But your
love, in the wake of the supernova that is
your love, will be left a void, an emptiness
from which we cannot escape, nor would we
want. For without you the very reason for
existence will be taken.
Sunday, August 1, 2010
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Let the monkeys out
School's out, school's out! Teachers let the monkeys out!
Well, not quite, but only a couple weeks left until the semester that never ends finally draws to a close. I'm not going to lie, the last four months have felt like an eternity. Maybe that's because it's one of the first time's I have made it a point to do well in school since I graduated high school forever ago. Maybe it's been the meds. Mayhap it's a bit of both, but I'm going to give a good chunk of that blame to the meds.
Seriously though, I've got a few things I'm working on creatively, and I've come to what would seem to be a crossroads. I've got two things I thoroughly enjoy in this world: creativity endeavors (fiction, movies, my own creation of goodies) and video games. It would seem that with the way I consume entertainment, games in particular, that something has to give. I'm thinking I really only have a couple options at this time.
One, I can continue to be a game-crazed-maniac, drop out of school (again), and just make an attempt to find another meaningless job during the upturn of a recession. (Good luck with that!)
Second, I can finally bring this nonsense to an end, stop talking about doing something, and actually do something.
I suppose I could just continue down the path I've chosen for the last ten years, but that's really not something I think I can handle any longer. Mediocrity and procrastination have brought me to this point and, frankly, I'm a little scared of where it would lead in another ten years.
I'm leaning toward option number two. A major factor in this coming up now is that a friend is trying to revive his theatre company this fall and has asked me to write the script for a staged old time radio show for a Halloween production. This scares me. Granted, I do love writing, but I've always written in the comfort of knowing only a few people will see it, and those people will rarely ever tell me how terrible it is. So now it comes down to not only finishing a writing project (that would be a great success), but completing something and then converting it into a script. The best part in this is that I'm not writing for my own amusement, but because it was requested of me. So now I don't have the option of putting it off and telling myself I'll complete it later because right now I just need to get one more level, or win ten more games, or whatever gaming distraction seems to have my attention.
Great aspirations.
As classes wind down the pressure will truly be on in the effort to put the finishing touches on a story I have been wanting to write for a couple years, but never have been able to convince myself the time was nigh for its completion.
Then comes the real fun. Libsyn. I've come to the realization that I'm a techtard, though others may not agree. I can find my way around most things, but this is something I just don't understand entirely. I'm not sure how much bandwidth or whatever I'll need to put audio files up or how would be best to host it. I know a website would be ideal, but jeez, money. I'm gonna hafta find some of that stuff in a suitcase or something to set this up. Hopefully it can work from this little blogspot for a bit until I can figure out how best to do this.
We'll just have to wait and see. Not too much waiting, mind you. Just enough to find a solution. Until then? I suppose this can suffice as a temporary solution.
Well, not quite, but only a couple weeks left until the semester that never ends finally draws to a close. I'm not going to lie, the last four months have felt like an eternity. Maybe that's because it's one of the first time's I have made it a point to do well in school since I graduated high school forever ago. Maybe it's been the meds. Mayhap it's a bit of both, but I'm going to give a good chunk of that blame to the meds.
Seriously though, I've got a few things I'm working on creatively, and I've come to what would seem to be a crossroads. I've got two things I thoroughly enjoy in this world: creativity endeavors (fiction, movies, my own creation of goodies) and video games. It would seem that with the way I consume entertainment, games in particular, that something has to give. I'm thinking I really only have a couple options at this time.
One, I can continue to be a game-crazed-maniac, drop out of school (again), and just make an attempt to find another meaningless job during the upturn of a recession. (Good luck with that!)
Second, I can finally bring this nonsense to an end, stop talking about doing something, and actually do something.
I suppose I could just continue down the path I've chosen for the last ten years, but that's really not something I think I can handle any longer. Mediocrity and procrastination have brought me to this point and, frankly, I'm a little scared of where it would lead in another ten years.
I'm leaning toward option number two. A major factor in this coming up now is that a friend is trying to revive his theatre company this fall and has asked me to write the script for a staged old time radio show for a Halloween production. This scares me. Granted, I do love writing, but I've always written in the comfort of knowing only a few people will see it, and those people will rarely ever tell me how terrible it is. So now it comes down to not only finishing a writing project (that would be a great success), but completing something and then converting it into a script. The best part in this is that I'm not writing for my own amusement, but because it was requested of me. So now I don't have the option of putting it off and telling myself I'll complete it later because right now I just need to get one more level, or win ten more games, or whatever gaming distraction seems to have my attention.
Great aspirations.
As classes wind down the pressure will truly be on in the effort to put the finishing touches on a story I have been wanting to write for a couple years, but never have been able to convince myself the time was nigh for its completion.
Then comes the real fun. Libsyn. I've come to the realization that I'm a techtard, though others may not agree. I can find my way around most things, but this is something I just don't understand entirely. I'm not sure how much bandwidth or whatever I'll need to put audio files up or how would be best to host it. I know a website would be ideal, but jeez, money. I'm gonna hafta find some of that stuff in a suitcase or something to set this up. Hopefully it can work from this little blogspot for a bit until I can figure out how best to do this.
We'll just have to wait and see. Not too much waiting, mind you. Just enough to find a solution. Until then? I suppose this can suffice as a temporary solution.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
I am Petty
Today I have all my petty thoughts and complaints put in their rightful place. I must admit, I do enjoy complaining on a certain level. It brings a bit of satisfaction when I can properly sum my frustrations and annoyances with an intelligent, and sometimes clever, use of words. But today those thoughts got destroyed and put in their rightful place.
I have been left near utterly speechless with the crisis facing a dear a friend. A friend, one of the very few to be true, who I consider a brother. At this time all I can do is try to think of anything I can do to help, but I know all I can do is show my support and offer what little help I am capable of providing. And that help is very little indeed.
The thing I do know is that somehow this will be survived. My friend, he's rather stubborn. Somehow through all the troubles he's faced in his life, troubles most of us would have difficulty imagining much less relating to, has developed a stubborn will to find a way. So now in what seems to be the darkest hour, another addition onto many such times, I will have the privilege (and the pain) of watching someone I've called "brother" persevere through another tribulation in which I feel helpless. My repeated statements of I'm here if you need me will undoubtedly fall well short of what is truly needed. But I've still got two rather sturdy shoulders to lean on and at times a brilliant use of words that rarely exceeds 140 characters.
This shall pass. The dust shall settle. And in the aftermath of this time of reckoning there will be one left standing. There will be no rise from ashes. In order to rise from the ashes one must be defeated. This friend does not lie down, does not surrender, and most certainly will not be defeated.
The BSC will endure.
The BSC will rise above it.
I have been left near utterly speechless with the crisis facing a dear a friend. A friend, one of the very few to be true, who I consider a brother. At this time all I can do is try to think of anything I can do to help, but I know all I can do is show my support and offer what little help I am capable of providing. And that help is very little indeed.
The thing I do know is that somehow this will be survived. My friend, he's rather stubborn. Somehow through all the troubles he's faced in his life, troubles most of us would have difficulty imagining much less relating to, has developed a stubborn will to find a way. So now in what seems to be the darkest hour, another addition onto many such times, I will have the privilege (and the pain) of watching someone I've called "brother" persevere through another tribulation in which I feel helpless. My repeated statements of I'm here if you need me will undoubtedly fall well short of what is truly needed. But I've still got two rather sturdy shoulders to lean on and at times a brilliant use of words that rarely exceeds 140 characters.
This shall pass. The dust shall settle. And in the aftermath of this time of reckoning there will be one left standing. There will be no rise from ashes. In order to rise from the ashes one must be defeated. This friend does not lie down, does not surrender, and most certainly will not be defeated.
The BSC will endure.
The BSC will rise above it.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Take 1 down pass it around
There are few things in this world to which I truly look forward. There's the days when I feel brave and eat at a Chinese buffet, redeeming a promised foot massage, or release of another podcast episode by the authors who have entertained me for thousands of hours thus far.
Today, sadly, there is one less thing for me to look forward to with the excitement of a dog knowing it's time for the kids to get home from school.
J.C. Hutchins is hanging up the mic for the time being and the news that sucks the color out of the world is the fact that the sequels, Deceit and Destruction, to his novel 7th Son: Descent have not been picked up for publication. His promotion for 7th Son: Descent was brilliant, intuitive, and captivating, but sadly it would seem the only people who were seeing it were those of us who had already committed to purchasing the book if it were to ever be released.
I know this isn't the last to be heard of Hutch. I have faith in the man that he will find a way to overcome yet another setback; and when he finally breaks through the stubborn mainstream wall that has been draining creators of originality for years the out-dated, old world business giants will be left frantically scrambling to get a piece of the pie.
It is a sad day. Yet Hutch will persevere and find a way to spread his word slinging talents to the masses. Just not yet. Soon, my children, soon you will feel the warmth and glory of J.C.'s silver words caressing you as you carried into another world, if only for a brief respite from this one.
Keep in mind that when the "mad hacker" (the prophet) speaks the flock listens.
Kilroy2.0 is here. Kilroy2.0 is everywhere.
Today, sadly, there is one less thing for me to look forward to with the excitement of a dog knowing it's time for the kids to get home from school.
J.C. Hutchins is hanging up the mic for the time being and the news that sucks the color out of the world is the fact that the sequels, Deceit and Destruction, to his novel 7th Son: Descent have not been picked up for publication. His promotion for 7th Son: Descent was brilliant, intuitive, and captivating, but sadly it would seem the only people who were seeing it were those of us who had already committed to purchasing the book if it were to ever be released.
I know this isn't the last to be heard of Hutch. I have faith in the man that he will find a way to overcome yet another setback; and when he finally breaks through the stubborn mainstream wall that has been draining creators of originality for years the out-dated, old world business giants will be left frantically scrambling to get a piece of the pie.
It is a sad day. Yet Hutch will persevere and find a way to spread his word slinging talents to the masses. Just not yet. Soon, my children, soon you will feel the warmth and glory of J.C.'s silver words caressing you as you carried into another world, if only for a brief respite from this one.
Keep in mind that when the "mad hacker" (the prophet) speaks the flock listens.
Kilroy2.0 is here. Kilroy2.0 is everywhere.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Back to the Grindstone
School is back, not quite in full swing just yet, and with school comes work. It was a nice month long break away from life, but it has led into some undesirable habits. The worst of which is sitting around on the computer, with my lover World of Warcraft (WoW), until the wee hours of the morning (3am-4am). The latest patch is going to be the death of me, especially since it would seem it was implemented specifically for people like myself. Those of us who are altoholics and would rather play 10 different characters rather than focus on just one.
AND MASS EFFECT 2 RELEASES NEXT WEEK!
If the most recent changes to WoW don't end me, surely the sequel to one of my favorite console games will be my undoing. I can live with that though. I have 4 more days in which to sleep and get fully rested before destroying myself to play through a science fiction rpg several times once again. (I played through the original Mass Effect 4 times with different characters). I suppose I could make an attempt to start "acting my age", but really, who does that?
On a more productive not I have discovered the joys of writing once more after overloading myself during NaNoWriMo back in November. Instead of focusing on one novel like a sane person I ended up writing 10,000-20,000 on four different ideas. That is definitely the nice thing about school starting back up though, I tend to focus considerably better when there is a limited amount of time in which to do the things I enjoy instead of having all day every day to do things and never completing anything.
The remainder of the month will most likely be spent putting my nose back to grindstone and figuring what things it is that are important now. Sure I love my games, my addictions, but between school and the painful urge to write, investing the amount of time in games that I have in the past just no longer seems feasible.
AND MASS EFFECT 2 RELEASES NEXT WEEK!
If the most recent changes to WoW don't end me, surely the sequel to one of my favorite console games will be my undoing. I can live with that though. I have 4 more days in which to sleep and get fully rested before destroying myself to play through a science fiction rpg several times once again. (I played through the original Mass Effect 4 times with different characters). I suppose I could make an attempt to start "acting my age", but really, who does that?
On a more productive not I have discovered the joys of writing once more after overloading myself during NaNoWriMo back in November. Instead of focusing on one novel like a sane person I ended up writing 10,000-20,000 on four different ideas. That is definitely the nice thing about school starting back up though, I tend to focus considerably better when there is a limited amount of time in which to do the things I enjoy instead of having all day every day to do things and never completing anything.
The remainder of the month will most likely be spent putting my nose back to grindstone and figuring what things it is that are important now. Sure I love my games, my addictions, but between school and the painful urge to write, investing the amount of time in games that I have in the past just no longer seems feasible.
The Verdict Is In
It's been hectic these last few weeks. Turns out I am lucky enough to have Severe Ulcerated Colitis, which is what I was afraid of. So now comes the time of truth. I can continue with the current habits and such, not change much of anything, and take ridiculously over-priced medication to keep things in check. Or there is the alternative of making a lifestyle change and hope that it is enough to beat things into submission and not have to worry so much about it.
Not that it's a huge change, I've just gotten complacent and lazy. The most difficult part, I believe, would be give up my tasty sodas. I have noticed than when I don't drink a lot of soda things go better, and then there's exercise, my old painful friend. Assuming I can manage to take care of those two things it should start going smoother.
The problem is that I have gotten comfortable in my pathetic routine. So it would seem it is time to make the decision and stop dragging my feet. The obvious decision is make the necessary changes, but lazy habits die hard I suppose.
Not that it's a huge change, I've just gotten complacent and lazy. The most difficult part, I believe, would be give up my tasty sodas. I have noticed than when I don't drink a lot of soda things go better, and then there's exercise, my old painful friend. Assuming I can manage to take care of those two things it should start going smoother.
The problem is that I have gotten comfortable in my pathetic routine. So it would seem it is time to make the decision and stop dragging my feet. The obvious decision is make the necessary changes, but lazy habits die hard I suppose.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
An update from the front
It's been an interesting couple weeks. I found out that I'm officially poor. I spent a few days at the hospital for tests and such. I got another test bumped up 2 weeks because of what they found. (That's never a good sign). When I spoke to the nurse she was almost frantic telling me they were trying to move things forward as quick as possible. I'm not sure if that's just her or if it's actually something wrong because they didn't tell me anything other than what I already knew. So hopefully she's just a frantic person.
School is finally over. Putting the finishing touches on my last paper of the semester tonight after work.
Then the extra joy of finding out I had no need of working yesterday and that next week the other tutors decided we weren't going to be working. I'm wondering why I wasn't told about that? But it was a fun time in the office when I found out about that little detail. Sadly there were only 2 people there.
It works out well that there is no work for me next week though since that's when my next fun with prepping and testing starts. Woohoo!
I can't wait to get this over with so maybe they'll find out what is wrong and give me lots of pretty drugs to make things better. Keeping my fingers crossed that there won't be any surgery involved. I really don't want to deal with the after effects of that. Yeck! Gotta remember to take a digital recorder with me next week since I'm sure I'll have lots of silly nonsense to spout.
On a good note though, the semester is over! Woot! I don't think I have ever looked forward to a break so much in my life. I wonder if that has something to do with the fact that I actually did the school thing this time around instead of just pretending. Hmm, something to ponder there.
School is finally over. Putting the finishing touches on my last paper of the semester tonight after work.
Then the extra joy of finding out I had no need of working yesterday and that next week the other tutors decided we weren't going to be working. I'm wondering why I wasn't told about that? But it was a fun time in the office when I found out about that little detail. Sadly there were only 2 people there.
It works out well that there is no work for me next week though since that's when my next fun with prepping and testing starts. Woohoo!
I can't wait to get this over with so maybe they'll find out what is wrong and give me lots of pretty drugs to make things better. Keeping my fingers crossed that there won't be any surgery involved. I really don't want to deal with the after effects of that. Yeck! Gotta remember to take a digital recorder with me next week since I'm sure I'll have lots of silly nonsense to spout.
On a good note though, the semester is over! Woot! I don't think I have ever looked forward to a break so much in my life. I wonder if that has something to do with the fact that I actually did the school thing this time around instead of just pretending. Hmm, something to ponder there.
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